Last month, I was on a call with a potential partner who spent the first three minutes explaining their biggest challenge — completely on mute. My co-founder and I just sat there watching them gesture at the camera, totally oblivious. When someone finally typed "you're on mute" in the chat, they unmuted and laughed it off. But those three minutes were gone. Nobody asked them to start over.
That's virtual meetings in 2026. The average professional now sits through 10+ video calls per week — roughly 392 hours per year. That's over 16 full workdays spent staring at a grid of faces. And somehow, 30% of that time is considered unproductive. Not because meetings are inherently evil, but because nobody ever stopped to think about how to actually run one well.
We've all been guilty. The accidental unmute. The email check during someone's presentation. The "sorry, you go — no, you go" dance that happens four times before someone finally just talks. The meeting that absolutely, definitely should have been a Slack message.
This guide is everything we've learned from running (and suffering through) hundreds of virtual meetings — and from building Convo to fix the worst parts of them. 25 rules organized by when they matter: before, during, and after the call. Whether you're on Zoom, Microsoft Teams, or Google Meet, these apply.
Before the Meeting
What you do in the five minutes before determines whether the next thirty are productive or pointless.
1. Send an agenda — or cancel the meeting
No agenda, no meeting. Full stop. If you can't write down what needs to be discussed and what decisions need to be made, you don't need a meeting — you need a Slack message.
Share it at least 24 hours in advance. Include specific topics, time allocations, and what you need from each person. Meetings without agendas waste 30% more time on average. And here's what nobody tells you: most people won't say your meeting was pointless. They'll just silently resent you for it.
2. Test your tech (yes, every time)
"Can everyone hear me? Is my screen sharing? Hello?" — We've all been that person. 77% of workers have lost meeting time to technical problems. Your IT team didn't build the "test audio" feature for decoration.
Check your mic, camera, and internet five minutes before the call. If you're screen sharing, open the right file in advance. A 60-second tech check saves the whole group from a 5-minute fumble.
3. Pick your background wisely
Your background says something about you whether you want it to or not. The pile of laundry. The college poster. The unmade bed that makes everyone quietly evaluate your life choices.
Find a clean, well-lit spot. Light in front of you, not behind — nobody wants to negotiate a deal with a silhouette. If your space is a disaster, a blurred or simple virtual background works fine. Save the tropical beach backgrounds for Friday happy hour.
4. Dress like you might have to stand up
The "business on top, pajamas on bottom" strategy works exactly until it doesn't. The doorbell rings. Your kid walks in. You need to grab a charger.
One of our engineers once stood up during a client call. Shorts with little flamingos on them. On camera. For three seconds that felt like three hours. Dress as you would for an in-person version of the same meeting. Client calls? Business casual minimum. Internal standup? Relaxed is fine — just keep it dignified.
This cat has more meeting presence than half your team.
5. Show up early
Join 2-3 minutes early for internal meetings, 5 minutes for external calls. Use this time to check your setup, skim the agenda, and mentally switch gears from whatever you were doing before.
Joining late disrupts the meeting and signals your time matters more than everyone else's. If you're going to be late, message before the start time — not five minutes in, when everyone's already noticed.
6. Review what happened last time
Nothing kills momentum like "Wait, what did we decide last week?" Skim the previous meeting notes before joining. What was assigned? What's pending? Who was blocked?
Walking in prepared prevents the group from wasting ten minutes re-covering old ground. This is honestly one of the hardest habits to build — which is why tools like Convo surface your previous meeting context automatically, so you walk in knowing who was blocked on what, what was decided, and which action items are still open. Even without a tool, two minutes reviewing old notes before a call changes everything.
During the Meeting
This is where most etiquette crimes happen — and where most people think they're doing fine.
7. Mute yourself. Seriously.
The #1 rule of virtual meetings and somehow still the most violated. Your dog barking. Your mechanical keyboard clacking. The construction crew outside. The barista calling someone's name behind you. Everyone can hear it. Everyone.
Stay muted by default. Unmute to speak. Re-mute when done. Make it muscle memory. Spacebar-to-talk in Zoom is your best friend — hold it while you talk, release to auto-mute. The people who've mastered this are doing God's work.
This happens to everyone. Yes, even you. Especially you.
8. Keep your camera on (usually)
58% of communication is nonverbal. When your camera is off, you're asking people to read your tone without facial expressions, gestures, or eye contact. That's just texting with extra steps.
Camera on for small meetings (under 10 people). Camera optional for large all-hands and presentations. If you're having a rough day, that's fine — but say so. A quick "camera off today, long night" is all it takes. Silently going dark makes people assume the worst.
9. Don't interrupt — the lag makes it worse
In person, you can read the room and jump in at natural pauses. On video, there's a 0.5-2 second delay. So when you think you're jumping in at the right moment, you're actually talking over someone mid-sentence. Cue the "sorry, you go — no, you go" dance that happens four times before someone finally just talks.
Use the raise hand feature. Wait 2-3 seconds after someone finishes. Or drop a quick "I have a thought on this" in the chat. It feels slow, but it's infinitely better than the interruption tango.
10. No multitasking — we can tell
The slightly-too-long pause before answering. The eyes scanning left to right (that's email, not the presentation). The classic "Sorry, can you repeat that?" We can always tell.
Close Slack. Close email. Close whatever Reddit thread is calling your name. If the meeting isn't worth your full attention, you probably shouldn't be in it (see Rule 25). And if you absolutely can't resist, at least turn off your camera — watching someone visibly not listen is worse than not seeing them at all.
You're not fooling anyone. We can see your eyes moving.
11. Look at the camera, not the screen
Here's a weird truth about video calls: to make "eye contact," you have to look at the camera lens, not at the other person's face on screen. Looking at the screen makes it seem like you're staring slightly down or to the side.
It feels unnatural. Do it anyway — especially when you're speaking. It dramatically changes how engaged and trustworthy you appear. Position your meeting window right below your camera to make it easier.
12. Speak clearly and embrace the pause
Audio lag means there's always a slight delay. Rush from point to point without pausing and nobody can get a word in — cue another round of the "you go / no you go" standoff.
Speak at a moderate pace. Pause after making a point. What feels like an eternity to you is a perfectly normal two seconds for everyone else. Silence is not your enemy — it's a sign people are actually thinking.
13. Use chat wisely
The meeting chat is great for sharing links, quick reactions, or flagging that you have something to add. It's not great for running a parallel conversation while someone is presenting.
If you're writing paragraphs in the chat while someone is talking, you're not listening. And they can probably see you typing. It's the virtual equivalent of passing notes in class — except the teacher can see you doing it.
14. Clean up before you screen share
Before you hit "Share Screen," take three seconds. Close unnecessary tabs. Hide chat apps. Dismiss notifications. Nothing derails a presentation faster than a Slack message from your group chat popping up, or everyone counting your 47 open browser tabs.
Share the specific window, not your entire desktop. And always confirm: "Can everyone see my screen?" — because the answer is "no" more often than you'd think.
The 47 tabs were the least of your problems.
15. Introduce people who don't know each other
In a physical room, people naturally introduce themselves. On video, everyone just stares at a grid of faces. If there are new people or cross-team members, the host needs to handle introductions.
"Before we start — Maria is joining from design, she's been leading the new dashboard." Two sentences. Five seconds. Makes a massive difference.
16. Don't eat on camera
Sounds obvious. And yet. Coffee during a casual standup? Fine. Crunching chips during a client presentation? Eating a full sandwich during a performance review? Absolutely not.
If you must eat (back-to-back meetings, we get it), camera off, mute on. Nobody wants to watch or hear it. This is a hill we will die on.
17. Take breaks in long meetings
49% of remote professionals report high exhaustion from daily video calls. If your meeting runs longer than 60 minutes, schedule a 5-10 minute break. Not optional — necessary.
After 45-60 minutes, attention drops off a cliff. A quick break lets people refill coffee, stretch, and come back actually able to focus. If you're the host who pushes through 90 minutes without a break, know that everyone has mentally checked out by minute 55.
After the Meeting
This is where most meetings actually fail — not during the call, but the follow-through.
18. Send a summary within 24 hours
The energy from a productive meeting disappears fast. "We agreed to change the timeline" means nothing two weeks later when nobody can remember why or what exactly changed.
Share a brief recap: key decisions, action items with owners and deadlines, and next steps. The longer you wait, the more detail evaporates. Tools like Convo generate these automatically and sync them to your CRM, project tools, or Slack — but even a manual email within the hour beats a perfect summary sent three days later.
19. Make action items specific
"We should look into that" is not an action item. "Sarah will research pricing options and share findings by Friday" is. Every action item needs three things: what needs to be done, who is doing it, and when it's due.
If it doesn't have a name and a date, it won't happen. That's not cynicism — that's the lived experience of everyone who's ever been in a meeting. Capture them during the call, not after. By the time you're writing from memory, you've already lost half the detail. A voice-to-notes tool can grab them as they come up.
It's been three weeks. He still hasn't sent it.
20. Don't auto-schedule the follow-up
Before defaulting to "same time next week," pause. Do you actually need another meeting for this? Could the follow-up be a Slack message, a shared doc, or an async update?
If you do need another meeting, schedule it before everyone leaves — finding time later always takes three times as long. But challenge the assumption. The best meeting is often the one you didn't schedule.
AI in Meetings: The New Etiquette
AI meeting tools are everywhere. The etiquette hasn't caught up — but it needs to.
21. Know the difference between bots and local tools
Not all AI meeting tools work the same way. Some — like Otter.ai or Fireflies — join your meeting as a visible bot participant. Everyone sees "Otter.ai is recording." Others — like Convo — run locally on your Mac without ever joining the call. No bot. No notification. Nobody knows you're using it.
This matters because the etiquette is completely different for each.
22. If your tool joins the meeting, disclose it
If you're using a bot-based tool that records, transcribes, or shows up as an attendee — you must tell everyone and get consent. This isn't just politeness. In many jurisdictions, it's a legal requirement.
Be upfront: "I'm using [Tool] to take notes — is everyone okay with that?" Give people the chance to say no. Springing a recording bot on someone in a sensitive conversation is a trust-breaker that's hard to undo.
At this point the bots should just meet without us.
23. Local tools are your business
A tool that runs on your device, doesn't join the call, and only helps you? That's a personal productivity aid. You wouldn't ask permission to open a notebook during a meeting. Same logic.
The key question: does it access other participants' data, or does it only help you? Tools like Convo run entirely on your Mac — they listen through your device's audio like your own ears do, then help you with summaries, suggestions, and follow-ups privately. No data shared, no participants affected, no disclosure needed. It's the difference between recording someone and taking your own notes.
Making Meetings Inclusive
Good etiquette means everyone gets to contribute — not just whoever talks loudest.
24. Don't treat camera-off as a character flaw
Some people turn their camera off because they're lazy. Some do it because of meeting fatigue, anxiety, sensory overload, or because their living situation isn't something they want to broadcast. 43% of remote workers turn off their camera as a coping mechanism.
Have a team conversation about camera norms instead of policing individuals. And never call someone out for having their camera off in front of the group. That's not leadership — it's a power trip.
25. Make space for the quiet ones
Virtual meetings have a loudest-voice-wins problem. Introverts, non-native speakers, and neurodivergent participants often can't find an opening in fast-paced discussions. The ideas are there — the opportunity to share them isn't.
As a host: explicitly invite input. "Alex, you've worked on this — any thoughts?" Use round-robin for important decisions. Make chat participation equally valid. Share agendas in advance so people who need processing time can prepare. We wrote a whole list of morning meeting questions specifically designed to get quiet team members talking — the right question changes everything.
For global teams: rotate meeting times so the same time zone doesn't always get the 6 AM slot. Record meetings for those who can't attend live.
The Most Important Rule: Know When NOT to Meet
Ever sat through a 30-minute meeting that could have been a three-line Slack message? Of course you have. Everyone has.
My co-founder has a rule: before scheduling any meeting, you have to finish the sentence "We need to meet because ___" with something that requires live discussion. If you can't, it's an email.
Skip the meeting if it's purely informational with no discussion needed, only needs input from 1-2 people, you can't name the specific decision to be made, it's a status update that belongs in a shared doc, or there's no agenda.
Keep the meeting if a live discussion reaches a faster decision than async back-and-forth, there are differing opinions that need real-time alignment, the topic is sensitive (performance reviews, conflict resolution), brainstorming benefits from live energy, or relationship-building is part of the goal.
Respecting people's calendars is the most underrated form of meeting etiquette. The best meeting is the one that didn't need to happen.
You know exactly which meeting this is about.
Quick Reference Checklist
Before
- ☐ Send agenda 24 hours in advance
- ☐ Test audio, video, and screen sharing
- ☐ Clean background, good lighting
- ☐ Dress for the meeting type
- ☐ Join 2-5 minutes early
- ☐ Review previous meeting notes
During
- ☐ Mute when not speaking
- ☐ Camera on for small meetings
- ☐ Use raise hand, don't interrupt
- ☐ No multitasking — close other tabs
- ☐ Look at camera for eye contact
- ☐ Don't eat on camera
- ☐ Break every 60 minutes
After
- ☐ Send summary within 24 hours
- ☐ Action items have owner + deadline
- ☐ Only schedule follow-up if actually needed
FAQ
Sources & References
- Notta - 100+ Meeting Statistics 2026
- FlowTrace - Meeting Statistics & Workplace Collaboration Data
- Harvard Business Review - Making Virtual Meetings More Inclusive
- Zoom - Video Meeting Etiquette Tips
- Microsoft - Best Practices for Teams Meetings